Katie Holmes Catches Detour from Broadway Into Stepford Boot Camp

The May 11th issue of Star Magazine soon hits newsstands with an oddly familiar cover story. Egomaniac husband unable to accept wife's desire to live life on her own terms vainly attempts to temper wife's independent spirit with subtle acts of domination, causing them to grow apart, eventually leading husband to squelch his growing anxiety over reduction of power in their relationship through the orchestration of a diabolical solution.

Ah, yes. The Stepford Wives. The original, although a cinematically primitive made-for TV movie, much better than the remake. Rent it, if you haven't already.

Meanwhile, can anyone confirm this blind item?

Rising Corn Prices and Bio-Fuel.

The effort to turn corn into fuel (ethanol) is being criticized now because of the rising food prices. However, some of the biggest cost increases are for meat products because farm animals to be used for food are fed mostly corn. So there is another way to look at this, if more and more people turn toward vegetable based diets then we wouldn't have massive animal feed lots that require huge amounts of corn.

So by being a vegetarian or vegan we help the environment in big ways and doing so also allows us to continue increasing production of bio-fuels without raising the price of food too drastically. How? It would free up ranch land to be used to grow more wheat, rice and soy to further offset the price of corn. Switching that ranch land from raising animals for food to growing crops would also help the food shortage world wide as we'd have a surplus of grains that could be shipped to areas who desperately need it.

Just raising something to think about.

~Peace to all beings~

Ashton Kutcher Dishes Dumb at "What Happens in Vegas" World Premiere

Ashton Kutcher must have been a daredevil dolt in his youth. Carmen Diaz, still dealing with the unexpected death of her dad, couldn't make the London world premiere of their light-hearted romp, What Happens in Vegas, leaving Kutcher to wing the red carpet alone.

Kind of feel sorry for the poor sap, spilling intimate personal details of his boneheaded antics under the influence. Guess he was absent from movie star school on the day they taught how to skirt embarrassing questions by scratching one's head and smiling amiably into the camera. Feast your eyes on this interview.

I can't be the only one who thinks Kutcher had a death wish at some point in his life. Mommy Demi should have been in tow for an emergency elbow nudging, although who knows whether that would have stopped him from spouting like a schoolgirl. Must be off spreading pregnancy rumors again. Oh, those two crazy kids.

Maybe we’re all being punk'd. Passed out on a frozen river and survived? Wonder if frostbite nipped Kutcher's unmentionables. Now that might explain a thing or two about those pregnancy rumors.

Judging from tepid fan reaction in the video, Lake Bell's scarlet pom-pom sleeved number made a poor substitute for Diaz. Does anyone else regard Bell as the poor man’s Amanda Peet? They both have that strong sexy nose thing going on, wide mouths, flashing eyes, but Peet seems infinitely more reserved.

Not reading between the lines on this one -- Kutcher and Peet had no chemistry whatsoever in their box office bomb, A Lot Like Love. Maybe Bell got the part in his Vegas film because he's drawn to dark sultry and was going for more wild with his nasty.

Although judging from the latest movie trailer, if Kutcher wants more wild, he should stick to drunken jumps from second story windows.

Disturbing "I Am Legend" Played Me Like A Violin

Hate gory sadistic horror films and not exactly a fan of futuristic sci-fi either, but something about I am Legend and the critical reviews grabbed my attention.

Love the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, mega huge fan of Baltimore-bred-and-educated wife, Jade Pinkett Smith (not the hair; sorry, hon), adore the blatant nepotic casting of young family members in this and his last flick (hey, if you've got it, flaunt it). Like other armchair critics (spoiler alert), I had no idea what to expect. Figured I would roll the dice and rent the DVD.

Yah, so now that it's over and I'm shaking like a leaf, I'll sum up in one word the voyeuristic experience of living only four years into the future stalked by humanoid carriers of a genetically engineered virus wreaking havoc on the few remaining strands of humankind, transforming the city of New York into a desolate hell hole, and punctuating almost every scene with an eerie fatalism of cure or be eaten: Disturbed.

Can't fault people (spoiler alert) for thinking this one is a masterpiece. This film has blockbuster (more spoiler) written all over it. Shooting locations unheard of in average run-of-the-mill fare. Recurrent themes of racism, beacons of light in the face of darkness, faith and ultimate redemption (bonus: the music of Bob Marley plays a pivotal twisted role in plot development). Butterflies and pathos. It's all there.

Yet, the sum of the movie's parts was frightening enough to make me cry, not from sheer horror, but from deaths of characters with whom I had briefly become attached. No, not the freaky mannequins, although Smith's performance in his second trip to the video store should have been nominated for an Oscar. Let's just say when the whole shebang climaxed, I felt drained like a played violin. I should have recognized standard movie ploys and kept my distance instead of allowing myself to connect with these incarnations of the human condition.

But don't go by me. I'm a marshmallow in the face of most horror and science fiction. Mind games I can handle. Cataclysmic destruction, not so much.

Self-Parodying Journalist Slobber Features Neil Patrick Harris

So, Neil Patrick Harris triumphs with a pithy turn in the stoner adventure, Harold & Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay. But how can anyone call his no-basis-in-reality debauched former child star portrayal an Oscar worthy self-parody?

"To the delight of fans and critics alike, he reprises his turn as Neil Patrick Harris, a doped-up, egomaniacal, prostitute-loving, unicorn-riding narcissist wielding his own personalized branding iron,"

heralds Donna Freydkin's puff piece in USAToday.

Ohhhhh....I get it....since he's gay in real life (not that there's anything wrong with that) and his partying days are behind him, his film alter-ego does curvaceous hookers and copious amounts of illegal substances. According to the article, Harris has nothing in common with his "overblown movie persona, aside from the...quick wit." Quick-witted doper. Now there's a study in contrasts.

Last time I looked, "self-parody" connoted imitation of one's own characteristics. Much as Harris wink-winks in this video, his turn in last weekend's number two film is no self-parody. I mean, as long as we're at it, let's call Kal Penn's Kumar character a self-parody too. In real life, the guy is educated, politically-minded, and well-spoken.

I can't stand fawning bj slants kissing up to the rich and famous. The slobber on this one has me scrambling for an umbrella. Just get a load of the way Harris makes nice with the Britney Spears guest spot on his precious sitcom, How I Met Your Mother.

"We were so conscious when she arrived to treat her well, but not ridiculously special," Harris says. "We wanted her to feel like a guest on our show. We wanted her to feel comfortable so she could do the work. And she did."

This garbage makes my stomach turn. Harris already complained big time about the guest spot cheapening the show. That's the kind of tarty tidbit I want to read whenever he tries to skim over the brouhaha simmering beneath.

Instead, we get sanitized reporting tied up neat and tidy in a bow. For whose benefit? Readers? Or reporters who self-parody reporters of news?

It's a Start.

London (PTI): World leaders on Friday welcomed China's decision to reopen dialogue with a representative of the Dalai Lama as a "major" and "first" step in resolving the vexed Tibet issue and to end the recent unrest there.

"We, together with other members of the international community, have consistently called for dialogue between the Chinese government and the Dalai Lama. I welcome today's announcement as the first step in that process," he said.

James: This is indeed a welcome development. However, my fear is that China is only doing this to improve its image abroad ahead of the Olympics and that after the games the talks will stop. That being said, I do have sincere hope though they will engage in a meaningful dialogue andthat the two sides really listen to one another. In Buddhism listening means being fully present with that person and being mindful of their concerns instead of just hearing them but thinking only of what you'll say next. Or how you can gain the upper hand with the issue being discussed and manipulate them.

Often we think of having a dialogue as better than resorting to violence and in the true meaning of the process it is of course the best way to settle disputes. However, dialogues can become verbally violent and abusive and cause harm and distrust as engaging in physical violence and intimidation does. We have to be careful because words can cause great suffering, they can bring peace but can just as easily cause war. So we must always try to listen with compassion and empathy because our "enemy" wants to be heard and understood just as we do.

However, there are times when one must speak sternly but we should always try to keep it from being abusive. In such instances it is easy to become haughty, insulting and patronizing. Thus I try to keep my stern language to a minimum but I often fail. Right Speech is a difficult teaching for me to practice sometimes. I always forget that when I do insult others that it causes more suffering for myself. It's pretty much impossible to insult others without causing pain to yourself as well. It's like throwing a boomerang at someone with the intent of hurting them but in doing so we open ourselves up to being hurt as well as the boomerang will come right back toward us.

Anyway, I sure hope that this new dialogue produces some results but perhaps at the very least it will build trust that is critical before any compromise and positive action can occur.

~Peace to all beings~

Maybe BarneyCam Should Do Upskirts and Nipple Slips

Celebrity upskirts and nipple slips are all the rage. Everywhere I turn, another blog article or video is out there exploiting famous embarrassment. With so many cameras trained on their every move, you'd think wary celebs would be more careful not to expose their naughty bits.

Nipslips and upskirts must be the inspiration behind Beavercam. I laughed myself silly at the intrepid buck-toothed rodent strapping a webcam to his furry head while trolling Hollywood Boulevard. Having just viewed the riotous DVD of Alvin and the Chipmunks, I see a real future for The Beav.

And then I got to thinking, which came first, BeaverCam or BarneyCam?

Barney, that lovable lolling canine of Dubya and Laura Bush, is the ostensible star of holiday themed webisodes created on behalf of our Executive Branch. I first learned about Barney's star power when White House insider David Almacy spoke at the morning plenary of GW University's 2008 Politics Online Conference.

Let's just say I've been waiting for the right opportunity to set the record straight about these webisodes and though this may not be it, I'm taking my shot.

According to David, BarneyCam was born by strapping a camcorder onto the President's pet and allowing him to romp around the White House grounds. Staffers wanted to provide information about the Executive Branch and limited access to the President on Whitehouse.gov and saw the videos as a way to attract the public. The pilot episode received over 8 million hits.

After reading my article about the Conference, David got the impression that President Bush was dying to be part of BarneyCam, sort of muscling his way in on Barney's success. He wanted me to know that wasn't the case. According to David, the President is and always has been the focus of these episodes.

The first time President Bush joined the cast, he made a joke about the number of viewers, something about whether his episode would get as many hits as the pilot. As I stated in my article, the President's webisode had low viewing stats, not because he was unpopular, but because the White House allowed other sites to embed the video.

Here's the feedback I received from David:

You are correct about the first [Barneycam focusing only on Barney] - I was referring to every one since. There wasn't a specific episode just focusing on the President and the shift occurred starting in 2005 as the Internet grew. The conversation I had with him about the 8 million [viewers] was not a separate meeting but rather just before we taped his part for that year's BarneyCam.

Phew! I am so glad to get that weighty matter off my chest, especially in an article about upskirts, nipple slips, and links to the President's daughter.

After Pennsylvania, Superdelegates Should Examine Crossover Republicans

Thought I got bored with the presidential election? Tuned out? Not exactly. The real answer, if you look and listen closely, can be found in this debate of talking heads.



On the day of the all deciding, all knowing, all confetti breaking loose Pennsylvania Primary, I have a lot on my mind. Sorry, but no links. You'll just have to trust that I know what I'm talking about.

Contrary to talking head opinions, Pennsylvania and Clinton's momentum in it (or lack thereof) will not decide the election. How many times do I have to hear "New York, California, Texas, Ohio, Pennsylvania..." (sometimes they even throw in Florida, as if that could somehow make a difference), and what follows it, to paraphrase, "If Obama can't win in the big states with big prizes of delegates, how can he expect to win in November?"

Idiotic profundity, as far as I'm concerned. That's the real reason I haven't been weighing in.

Obama leads in delegates. No matter what Clinton does or which states she wins from today on, Pennsylvania included, she cannot win the number of delegates needed to cinch the nomination. Prove me wrong, go ahead, the comments section is open.

That means the Democratic nominee will be decided by superdelegates, many of whom, at this stage of the election, will not commit to a candidate. We all know Democratic Party elders have leaned on them to commit. Whether they will actually do so when all states have held their primaries is any one's guess. But assuming they will, how should superdelegates decide?

Many say by looking to the popular vote, i.e. tallying up all primary votes to determine which candidate received the majority. I strenuously disagree.

Florida and Michigan were disenfranchised and though these states went to Clinton, who knows how many of their citizens didn't bother to vote? The other Democratic contenders, Obama included, didn't wage campaigns there. This on instructions of the Democratic Party. This on instructions which practically all Democratic contenders heeded except Hillary Clinton. This, in itself, shows how much Clinton is in this race for herself. But more on this point later.

Superdelegates can neither count nor discount votes in Michigan or Florida because these votes were not obtained in a fair manner. Hold primaries there again? Out of the question. Nobody will foot the bill. Not to mention the havoc it would play with the candidates' schedules. Not to mention the black eye to a Party already deciding not to seat those delegates. Not to mention whatever else I've been too busy to read as to why voters in those states will not get a second bite of the apple.

At this stage of the election, the popular vote is no longer fair game. What would have been fair back at the time of the Potomac Primaries is no longer relevant. Because of Florida and Michigan, we Democrats can never truly know which candidate won the popular vote. Now that Clinton has turned the process into an ugly mud fight for the benefit of the Republicans, all bets are off and the popular vote should go out the window with it.

I don't know about other Democrats, but at this stage of the election, I'm sticking by my party. And what I see are two candidates, Clinton and Obama, who are virtually identical on the issues. The only thing separating them, as pointed out by the talking heads video, is character and ability to lead.

Sorry if you disagree with me, but I don't think there's any question which candidate is superior in these two areas.

Clinton is not be trusted. Bosnia isn't the only lie in this woman's past. Clinton is Machiavellian when it comes to politics. Just look at the way she and Carville lashed out at Bill Richardson. Contrary to her New Hampshire crocodile tears, it's obvious to almost everyone I speak that Clinton is in this race for herself. She will do more damage to the country with policies she and Obama share than Obama ever could.

Obama, despite what talking heads want to say about his lack of patriotism, his questionable associations, and his supposed lack of experience (a subject for a later article), possesses basic goodness and decency. Obama has something Clinton will never have, couldn't have for all the spin in the news cycle.

Conviction of principles.

Make no mistake about this, my fellow Democrats, the Republicans are having a field day over Clinton's dirty politics and the piggybacking antics of John McCain. Obama has been taken through the wringer about his personal associations and out of context comments regarding bitter voters. Not that questions about such matters are off limits -- they are not -- but these questions and Obama's responses to them are muddying the waters at a time when John McCain is literally getting a free pass. Normally, these types of accusations are traded between candidates when each Party's nominee has been decided.

The only ones trading blows here are the Democrats!

At this stage of the election, anyone who is not truly affiliated with the Democrats has no right to weigh in on the Democratic nominee. I wish conservative talk radio hosts would get back to the issues. Fed up? You bet I am. These people are laughing themselves silly over Limbaugh's "Operation Chaos." When they bash Obama, and Clinton and her supporters jump on the bandwagon, it hurts the Democrats.

I know this is so obvious it sounds stupid, but the Republicans have an agenda. They bash Obama because they want to run their weak candidate, McCain, against the weaker of the Democratic candidates, Clinton. Whether Democrats are too divisive within their own party to realize this is happening, I'm not certain. All I know is that it is indeed happening. And Clinton will ride this wave of Obama criticism without regret or a second thought for the Party as far as it will take her, all the way down Pennsylvania Avenue until superdelegates put down their collective feet, stand their ground and say, "Enough!"

We all know Clinton will change with the wind, has already proven she will flop with public opinion, will alter course on any plan of action to appease criticism, will fire campaign staff at will and stomp on loyalty if it means ratcheting up her voter favoritism a notch. First woman president fantasies be damned, this is not a person the majority of Americans will vote to occupy the White House come November.

Whether she wrests the nomination from the hands of Obama in a knock down drag out fight to the end, Clinton cannot win the general election. The only thing Hillary Clinton will ever achieve from this point on is bringing the Democratic Party down in flames. That's what Republicans are hoping for, praying for, folks. Four more fat years under John McCain. They'll worry about 2012 later.

How do I know? Let's just say I talk to people. All kinds of people. Republicans included. What do they grumble about under their breath? They don't like McCain. In fact, they may crossover to the Democrat in this election, that's how much they don't like their annoited nominee.

Will they vote for Clinton? No. But they might cast a vote for Obama. Maybe. Perhaps. It depends upon a lot of different factors. However, unlike when these Republicans discuss Clinton, they haven't ruled out the possibility of a vote for Obama. Therein lies the real difference between the last two Democrats standing. The superdelegates would be wise to take notice.

In Clinton's zeal to win the nomination at all costs, she has forgotten the simple tenet of Party loyalty. She has forgotten how her personal actions could result in victory for the Republicans. This late in the process, with McCain their lock nominee and her "take no prisoners" battle cry, Clinton is rapidly scraping the shine off the Democrats one true chance to win back the White House.

When Pennsylvania primary results come trickling in tonight, if Clinton should emerge victorious, I just hope the superdelegates will have the guts and courage of conviction to look past the short term. A handful of wins in large states does not, will not assure a Clinton victory in the general election. When push comes to shove, when this battle finally does reach its culmination, the war will be won on the backs of crossover Republicans.

Could it be any more clear which of the two Democrats has the best chance of meeting them on the other side?

Earth Day, Buddhism and Vegetarianism.

Today is the day in America that we celebrate our beautiful and life-giving planet Earth which hosts us as guests. Yet we aren't often being very nice guests with our treatment of this very environment that keeps us alive and thriving. So on this Earth Day I would like to address the connection between vegetarianism and the environment. If you strongly disagree with vegetarianism and don't wish to hear how eating meat impacts or environment then you might want to avoid this post. This is a subject that I am passionate about and have mentioned often here. I am trying to do my part to help understand how our eating habits affect our well-being both physically, socially and spiritually.

The first precept in Buddhism encourages no killing and that can very much be applied to our diet. By switching to a vegetarian lifestyle we can greatly help save the environment in a big way.
Farm animals take up more water than vegetables/gains, taking nearly half of our water supply and 80% of our land. Animals raised for eating consume 90% of the soy, 80% of the corn crop and 70% of the grain. According to the Water Education Foundation, it takes 2,464 gallons of water to produce one pound of beef in California. This is the same amount of water you would use if you took a seven-minute shower every day for six entire months. In contrast, only 25 gallons of water are needed to produce one pound of wheat.

David Pimentel from Cornell University explained it this way, 40 calories of fossil fuel are needed to produce one calorie of protein from feedlot beef while only two calories of fossil fuel are needed to produce one calorie of protein from tofu. Adopting a vegan diet actually does more to reduce emissions than driving a hybrid car! Methane may be the most serious gas given off from livestock. In fact the meat industry is the number one source of methane throughout the world, releasing over 100 million tons a year. Methane is a gas that traps heat in the atmosphere and causes the earth’s temperature to rise. Noam Mohr in his report on global warming says, “methane is 21 times more powerful a greenhouse gas than carbon dioxide.” The summery being that raising animals for food is much less efficient than the growing of crops.

In addition, clear cutting of our precious rainforest's to raise animal meat is devastating to the overall environment for many reasons: The rainforest's clean our air, provide medicinal products, maintain a large biodiversity and act as a heat regulator and water pump for the environment.

They release moisture into the atmosphere which returns to the ground as rain. When the forest is cleared, the water cycle is disrupted, temperatures increase, droughts become common, and eventually deserts may form. For example, the drought in the Sahelian belt (south of the Saharah Desert), has been attributed to deforestation in West Africa. Estimates suggest that tropical deforestation currently contributes at least 19% of greenhouse gas emissions. Tropical forests have been described as "the lungs of the Earth". However in mature primary forest, storage and release of carbon is in balance. Carbon-dioxide consumed during photosynthesis is equalled by that released when organic matter decays. A standing forest acts as a store or sink of carbon. On the other hand, when forests are burned or logged and the debris left to decay, carbon dioxide is released into the atmosphere.

Rainforest's and other forests also help reduce and prevent flooding, soaking up water like a sponge. Without those forests soil erosion increases which adds to a leaching of life giving minerals. In general, our trees are vital resources in reducing global warming and maintaining the fragile balance that enables sustainable life possible. The devastation of our forests directly contribute to increasing animals suffering by destroying their habitats within our forests they are driven to less sustaining land and eventually extinction. It isn't just our forests that suffer, our oceans are damaged by over-fishing, the destruction of plant life important to animal survival along rivers and water born diseases that threaten both human and animal life.

Vegetarianism is following the middle path because it makes it more possible to consume only what we need and reduce our negative impact on a planet which we share with so many other sentient beings. We humans arrogantly think too often that we are the center of this planet and that the environment is simply something to consume and fulfill our cravings.
However, we are learning the painful lesson as to just how fragile the life sustaining environment really is. A healthy environment maintains the balance of life that is crucial to all life on this planet and that balance is the Earth's version of the middle path. We cause great suffering when we veer off that environmental middle path.

Vegetarianism is a way to over-come our desires for less sustainable foods that aren't necessary to man's survival. In Buddhism we know the danger and suffering that awaits us when we over-indulge in our desires and our lust for meat is destroying our bodies and our very home. We are acting like parasites that suck all the life out of an organism and then move onto the next one but we are quickly running out of resources to sustain that type of living. It is quite possible that our rampant consumer economy and lifestyle choices could very well be our own down-fall, we are quite possibly slowly killing ourselves and many other innocents lives--those of the animals. See, animals do not over-consume their resources, they take only what is needed and should be examples for us in how to maintain sustainability. As we know, we are forever linked to the animals and so as they die off, so do we.

The Buddha was greatly impacted and connected with the environment as he spent much of his time in the forests and wilderness. In addition, he developed a peaceful relationship with animals throughout his life, even stopping a charging elephant with his peaceful presence and it was in a deer park that Buddha taught his first lessons. It is said that when Buddha meditated under the Bodhi tree that animals gathered all around him and didn't feel frightened by his presence.

Respecting animals is also vital to understanding the Buddhadharma because we have all undoubtedly been one in a past life and a cow that we might be responsible for killing to provide meat could have been our mother at one point. In addition, Right Livelihood advises us to not take jobs that create suffering such as a butcher of animals.

We can talk about the second precept too in not taking what is not given. An animal does not want to suffer and does not give up it's life without a fight, so in other words it is not "giving" itself to us. We are taking what is not given by killing animals. We humans constantly take from the environment and animals as if they belong to us and are simply there to serve us and our needs.

All of this being said, it is not required to be a vegetarian in Buddhism and in some areas of the world it is nearly impossible not to eat meat because of poor crop growing conditions. However, I think that if one must eat meat that they should do it with as much moderation as possible and with Right Intention. This means killing animals as humanely as possible and not doing it out of anger or unnecessarily such as sport hunting. It also means using every single bit of the animal to reduce waste and therefore the number of animals killed.

May we all find ways to help ease our Mother Earth's suffering.

~Peace to all beings~

The Power of Tea.

Green spring day
Warm tea
Taste of Nirvana

-by They Call Him James Ure

That's my first haiku, does it fit the definition?

Did you know that tea is the second most consumed beverage in the world? Second only to life sustaining water and has long been connected with Buddhism, especially within Zen Buddhism with the Japanese tea ceremony.

There is so much symbolism and lessons to be learned with tea. The Way of Tea is expressed in four Japanese characters: Harmony, Respect, Purity and Tranquility. These are all aspects of the traditional Japanese tea ceremony. I mean no disrespect to the beautiful Japanese tea ceremony by not going into the honored details of the ceremony in-depth but I am not familiar enough with them to attempt to describe them in the manner they deserve. So instead, I would like to discuss my interpretations of these words from my own understanding.

The first character, harmony reminds me of the Buddhist teaching on interconnection/inter-being. We would not be able to enjoy tea without the sun and water/rain that helped grow the tea, nor without the human hands that cultivated and harvested the leaves.

In addition, without rich soil there would be no tea and then with fitting reunion, the water is returned to the plant in a hot form to steep and release the tea into our cups. The web of factors that enable us to enjoy our tea is endless.

For me, respect in regards to tea means honoring the plant for honoring my body with it's essence and health giving properties.

Purity makes me think of the clean water used to release the pure, natural chemicals within the tea. As well as feeling like the health-giving liquid is purifying my body with each sip. In addition, thinking of purity while drinking tea reminds me of the purifying nature of drinking in the Dharma which purifies the mind.

Tranquility. Savoring tea and the warmth of the cup enables great relaxation especially when done in quietude. Tea has long been known for its ability to relieve stress, relax the body/muscles and help induce peacefulness. Sipping tea in silence helps bring about greater tranquility and can be a type of meditation itself. Speaking of meditation, drinking tea is often a lovely way of reflecting after a formal meditation.

When we talk or listen to the mindless drone of the television while imbibing tea we often miss the full tranquility that those moments of drinking tea offer us. That being said, drinking tea under many circumstance can bring plenty of benefits as well. In keeping with this idea of tranquility, I discovered a lovely tea which has the relaxing ingredients of honey, vanilla and chamomile within it.

I discovered this delicious tea the other day while at my therapy appointment. My Psychologist always offers me either tea or water before settling into the session. This particular tea that she recommended that day is called honey vanilla chamomile and it's one of the most flavorful, enjoyable teas that I have ever had, within days I went out and bought a box. I keep the tea bag in the mug for a long time to really get the most flavor and I also stir in a little sugar. It's such a nice, relaxing treat in the mid-afternoon, in the evening, after meditating or whenever. If you like tea then I'd really recommend it, it's made by the American company Celestial Seasonings.

Enjoy your tea!

~Peace to all beings~

Maybe It's the Combover: A Night at the Roxbury Reduced to Commercial

Ever wonder how a great idea gets reduced to a 2008 Super Bowl commercial? I did last night as I watched the truncated version of Pepsi's "Wake Up People" campaign. All that seems to be left of this major motion picture production is the combover guy nodding off at a diner.

The original "Roxbury Guys" would have found a way to exploit that flying wisp of hair. Heck, they'd probably offer to make combover guy an honorable Butabi.

Not familiar with the classic Saturday Night Live "Roxbury Guys" sketch created by cast members Will Ferrell and Chris Kattan? The running gag of shiny suited brothers, Steve and Doug Butabi out on the town, bobbing their heads in syncopated rhythm to Haddaway's Don't Hurt Me? At clubs, high school dances, etc., the boys stand together, a sea of dancers splitting, revealing two bobbleheads at the bar. Always mistakenly exchanging dance requests with prospective partners, it wasn't unusual for one of them to suddenly grab some unsuspecting female. The punchline, if you will, has the poor woman bouncing back and forth between both men. The bopping of heads and ravaging of dance partners made the skit an instant hilarious classic which, I suppose, is the reason Pepsi decided to tweak the idea into a commercial for soft drinks.

In 1998, Ferrell and Kattan earnestly attempted to stretch this ten minute gag into an hour and twenty minute movie. A Night at the Roxbury is the reference point for most people making a connection between the Pepsi commercial and the Butabis. The film wasn't well received, but then again, Ferrell and Kattan have always resonated more with their fans than the critics.

If these are the best out takes from the movie, this is one time I'm on the side of the critics. But I disagree with people who suggest the sketch was too flimsy for a feature film. "Roxbury Guys" had all the right elements for a feature film if it had stuck with the original punchline. Even in this short movie compilation, the essential elements of the gag -- losers who knock around women wanting nothing to do with them -- are nowhere to be found.

For some reason, mostly all that remains of the Roxbury sketches on the Internet are videos featuring SNL guest host Jim Carrey as Mark Butabi, third brother of Doug and Steve.

The episode aired in Season 21 on May 18, 1996, catapulting "Roxbury Guys" into a stratosphere reserved for SNL legends, much like Gilda Radner's Lisa Lubener, Eddie Murphy's Mr. Robinson, and Billy Crystal's Ricardo Montalban. Perhaps Carrey's edge was the impetus needed to propel the skit into a movie, but it was not the first, nor the last time "Roxbury Guys" had staked a claim at SNL.

The brothers Butabi appear to have made their debut in Season 21 on March 23, 1996. Phil Hartman, a former cast member later murdered by or with his wife, guest hosted. The boys bopped their heads to the beat of Haddaway, hanging out in a bar to harass fellow cast member Cheri Oteri. Obscure cast member David Koechner may have played the bartender. Ferrell says the characters were based upon an actual club guy in Santa Monica. No known video footage of the original sketch could be found at the time of this article.

On September 18, 1996, celebrated actor Tom Hanks hosted the show, joining the "Roxbury Guys" for another skewer of Cheri Oteri and a taste of their own medicine.

Tom Hanks with Roxbury Guys. sélectionné dans N.C.

Why Kattan stayed behind bars with those gang bangers when the cell door remained open is a mystery of live sketch comedy. When Don Pardo announces, "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night" for each show, he really means "live."

On December 7, 1996, former cast member Martin Short guest hosted episode 414. Some of that footage is mixed in with the Helen Hunt episode below. Short played a foreign relative of the Butabis out for a night on the town and a peep show. If memory serves me correctly, the gag involved a somewhat naked woman with pasties shaking her stuff as the door to the peep opened and closed at the sexiest moment. Each time it reopened, the girl was gone or someone unexpected had taken her place. Short stood there with a glazed look in his eyes grabbing for the girl, but the episode was largely forgettable. I think it ended with him being revived with heart paddles on the operating table, but, baby, don't quote me (no more).

On February 22, 1997, Season 22, episode 420 aired with Alec Baldwin as guest host. Baldwin's Butabi looked like a younger version of himself in outtakes and photos. Unfortunately, I can't find anything online other than what's mingled with Helen Hunt. Gold chains, big hair, and shiny suit. Judging from the out takes, Baldwin is the lucky friend who nabs the girls in the sketch described as "Doug and Steve get flustered."

Tina Turner performed Proud Mary live as the evening's musical guest. Now that was something spectacular. Baldwin hosted the show so many times with so many other memorable performances, it's difficult to recall exactly how he held up as a bobblehead. As with the premiere sketch, at the time of this article, other than what may be mixed into the Helen Hunt video below, no known footage of his appearance exists online.

Episode 424, Season 22, aired on April 19, 1997. Pamela Anderson had a series of mad encounters with the boys throughout the night that ended, as usual, with the Butabis leaving the scene empty handed.

Pamela Anderson with Roxbury guys. sélectionné dans N.C.

Sylvester Stallone guest hosted the show, playing "Roxbury Rocky" in Season 23. The sketch aired on September 27, 1997.

Roxbury guys with Sylvester Stallone sélectionné dans N.C.

I never sat through all the Rocky sequels, but I assume the kids running around Sly have something to do with a plot line from one of them. Yawn.

On December 13, 1997, in episode 435, Helen Hunt guest hosted, appearing as a psychoanalyst for the Guys after her Best Actress Oscar win for As Good As It Gets. Co-star Jack Nicholson made a riveting cameo appearance that nearly brought down the house. Unfortunately, this compilation video is the best I could find. Apparently, many of the "Roxbury Guy" videos have been removed from YouTube for copyright violations. Somehow, they missed this one. Let's hope they don't find and unembed it before you finish this article.

What may be the final Roxbury sketch first aired on September 26, 1998. Cameron Diaz guest hosted, appearing as the mysterious woman who finally lets the Guys take her home.

Roxbury Brothers avec Cameron Diaz sélectionné dans Humour et Sketchs

When the episode aired again on Comedy Central around 9/11, I remember the country, for the most part, still being in a state of shock, workers tearing up Ground Zero digging for survivors, and later for recovery of human remains, at least what hadn't been completely incinerated. It's almost seven years later, yet I haven't quite fully recovered.

Yes, it served as an awful reminder of a horrendous American tragedy. Fellow Americans need your help. Donate. Give blood. The mood of the country? Fairly morose would be an understatement.

And then, Dan Ackroyd and Steve Martin made it all disappear. For a moment, I know I was -- perhaps anybody watching the episode who had been a fan since SNL's inception was -- transported back to a kinder, gentler, happier time. Not that the late 70's weren't turbulent. They were. And like today, gas prices were bringing down the economy.

But back then, watching the Not Ready for Prime Time Players, I could always count on a lift in my spirit. So many classic sketches and characters. The Fenstruk Brothers -- plaid clad clashing barfly foreign imbeciles, never got the girl, always acted inappropriately -- made me burst out laughing each time they gyrated their hips and pointed those fingers. "We are two wild and crazy guys," uttered in the foreign accent of people barely able to speak English was a catch phrase back then. Kind of in the nature of "You bet your sweet bippy," or "Mom always liked you best."

SNL has evolved a lot since then and still makes me chuckle, just not like the guffaw days of the late 1970's. The moment the Fenstruks revealed themselves at the bar, a cloud lifted. I felt happy again. And life slowly moved on.

Like the Haddaway song that started the saga, "Roxbury Guys" will live on.

Florida Teens Violent Video Explained

Just in case skanks don't get the message.

Be Like Clouds.

Let your actions be like clouds going by; the clouds going by are mindless. Let your stillness be as the valley spirit; the valley spirit is undying. When action accompanies stillness and stillness combines with action, then the duality of action and stillness no longer arises.

-Pei-chien

James: There is nothing that needs be said after such beautifully worded insights.

~Peace to all beings~

PHOTO CREDIT: Himalaya Blue and thanks to Tom for giving me the site address.

If Wishy-Washy Dems Had Their Way at the Convention

(Hillarobama's hair is a spewed version of the original)



Source: [Panda Pages]

Neil Patrick Harris "Will and Graces" Britney Spears

Despite good reviews and great ratings for her psycho receptionist guest spot on the popular TV program How I Met Your Mother and buzz about a possible recurring role, cast member Neil Patrick Harris would rather ban Britney Spears from appearing on the show again.

As reported by Erin Carlson via AP, the former Doogie Howser, M.D. star wants the show to succeed on its content, not guest stars.

"I worry that if they start `Will and Grace'-ing us too much, that the show will suffer. And we're all really proud of the content of the show. I mean, viewership is not our game. It's the network and the studio's game, you know. It's the promotion department's game," said Harris in an AP story that appeared the previous week.

And so, like Jumping the shark," "Will and Gracing" enters the lexicon as a term of art in the world of entertainment.

Let me take a shot at a definition:

"Will and Gracing" - peppering low-rated entertainment with guest stars to increase advertising revenue.

Anyone else want to take a stab?

Evolution of a Gossip Exclusive - Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are Engaged

I may be giving away too much information about my investigative reporting techniques - HA! - but couldn't leave this one languishing on the trail.

The titillating "stop the presses" news about the engagement of Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz seems to have started with an exclusive dish at in Touch magazine sometime yesterday.

As of posting time, blondesaresoout had updated all her friends at Friends or Enemies with "breaking news" about the engagement approximately nineteen hours prior. No permalinks here, folks. You'll just have to trust that it came from the horse's mouth.

This morning about 9:00 a.m. their time, Starpulse ran with the item as if it broke the story. No credit to in Touch. Ouch.

About seven hours ago article post time, the story began to rise dramatically in the Wikio entertainment world. It has four votes currently. Wonder how many it will have by the time you visit the link.

From there it became fodder for the gossip masses. At least Blackberry had the decency to credit the original source.

Ashlee and Pete's engagement news is quickly making its way across the blogosphere. At posting, The Hollywood Gossip led the pack, taking credit for the story about eight hours ago ahead of other blogs hoping to make a splash. Maybe it's just my computer, but some content was blocked as spyware, so you may not want to follow this link. I just find it amusing that the "Free Britney" reporter gave credit for the story to US Weekly.

Us magazine buzzed the story as an exclusive today, I guess because they added tacky gossip about Ashlee's possible pregnancy. Can't discount the possibility of a hush-hush pregnancy now can we? Don't ask me how that somehow elevates the story into exclusive territory. But many bloggers probably won't take the time to investigate, and soon the real in Touch exclusive will be just another faded memory.

Does an exclusive remain an exclusive news item if the online community gives the credit to another source?

That was a rhetorical question.

By this evening, the mainstream media will have the story as leading news. It will be interesting to see who gets the credit for the exclusive.

Paris and Nicole Frenemy Feud Signals Lapses in Tabloid Journalism

First they were BFFs. Then they were mortal enemies. Next it was kiss kiss, make up. Then they seemed to be somewhat more tolerant of one another. But then one of them upped the ante by donating a gift to charity. And later it got plain ugly.

And now? Let's just say that one of them is starting to sound like a petulant 6-year old.

"She's copying me! She's copying me! If she gets pregnant with my boyfriend's twin brother, I'm going to go blooey!"

Oh my Lord, make it stop.

I know as well as anyone this story has very little to do with celebrity politics. It's pretty much a rehash of the same garbage you can find on all the other celebrity gossip sites. But, I cannot look away, I mean, come on, these two are grown-ups -- one of them already raising a child -- and their emotional development is so superficial and stagnant, it makes me want to pray for the next generation of celebrity train wrecks.

Stories like this sell magazines and online advertising better than anything I could ever splice together. I don't fault celebrity tabloids for making fluff like this headline news. My big complaint is about week after week story lines focusing on nothing else. How many times is Britney Spears going to be on the cover of OK! magazine? It's become sort of a running joke in my house every time the free subscription arrives.

"Guess who's on the cover of OK!? Okay, you guessed it." Next.

If tabloid journalists would do a better job of digging the dirt rather than constantly focusing on the bottom line, perhaps I'd be reading some real news in those glossies. No wonder their colleagues think of them as the Danny Bonaduces of journalism.

Get investigative. Plant some restaurant spies around Hollywood and Manhattan. Give me something juicy I can really dig my teeth into. For heavens sake, throw this Baltimore gal a meaty bone.

Perhaps it's because I only began spending my life on the Internet last summer that I missed the big news story about the Paris Hilton cell phone hack. Don't follow this link if you're easily offended by nudity and inappropriate language. Apparently, someone hacked into or figured out the easy password to Paris Hilton's cell phone, providing access to actual celebrity phone numbers, email accounts, and naughtily positioned photographs. The FBI began an investigation and then...well...because the tabloids lost interest, or more likely never bothered with the story in the first place, who knows?

I found this item while searching for information about a different celebrity news story. It no longer links to The Drudge Report which is a real shame given its news worthiness.

Smoking Meat Loaf Spot is Sexy Hot Shill for GoPhone

Does anyone else think the Meat Loaf GoPhone commerical is smoke'n? Not talking about the sparks and fire effects, nah. I mean the way it literally oozes sex appeal.

How some suit took a sizzle and pop classic and mutated it and its primary crooner into shills for cell phones, I'll never know.

There's the Meat, back from career hell and sounding like the way I remember. We used to rock out to this song during air guitar jams in the dorm. Even in his younger days, Meat Loaf was never the kind of rocker who inspired girls to swoon. But his music marks a period in time when practically everyone had some kind of twisted experience tied to Dashboard Light.

For some reason, this longer version of the commercial never seems to make it on the air. Maybe if AT & T sold more GoPhones, they could could afford the cost of the extra half minute.



Is it just me? Or is the son character kinda hot?

Caught the shorter incarnation of "Paradise By the GoPhone Light" during last night's American Idol Gives Back. It was then I remembered how Idol almost single-handedly revived the Meat's career by pairing him with Katherine McPhee. He must have some connections to a producer or Simon because his performance was less than spectacular.



I figured old Meat's second shot came and went which is sometimes just as well. Sometimes, it's best not to mess with memories. But never underestimate the power of an aging rock star. With this commercial, the Meat is back. It'll be fun to see how it all plays out.

But not so fun to accidentally find Ms. McPhee later trashing the rock icon as if he's some kind of joke. Okay, we get it, his talent has seen better days. But even on his worst day, the Meat is a whole lot classier than this dizzle.



"And like, he comes in like, and he’s like, like this frumpy older man, and like just the sweetest guy in the world, but I was like, this looks like, like one of my best friends’ dads, like..."

Talk much? Like give me like a break.

Where does she get off making the Meat into some kind of Ashton Kutcher punk? What has she done that's been notable?

Well, let me sleep on it, I'll give you an answer in the morning.

Somebody Needs to Kill the "Who Killed Obama" Line

From the maker of "Who Killed Anna Wintour" tees, wretched peek-a-boo mumus, and fashion Jewish star tote tops comes the latest insanity apparel, "Who Killed Barack Obama" hoodies and short-sleeved tees.

Doron Braunshtein a/k/a Apollo Braun claims his provocative mini-collection memorializing eavesdropped customer concerns is a showing of support for the Democratic frontrunner rather than a morbid premonition of imminent demise. Braun claims he supports Barack Obama and can't understand death threats he's received from Obama supporters.

But this time, Braun has gone too far and he knows it.

"Could you imagine if Obama were killed? They might blame me. Then I'd be take to jail and have to have prison sex."

Not that he would seem to mind, according to Jerry Portwood of the New York Press.

File this one in the "people will do anything to make a buck" category. Does this nimrod actually believe these tasteless concoctions evoke feelings of love and support for Senator Obama? I suppose being the biggest fan of Anna Wintour motivated him to create her killing tees as well.

What bothers me most about Braun's supposed "performance art" is the notions they will plant in otherwise vapid minds with a yen for infamy. If anything deserves to be banned as hate speech, it's Braun's new mini-collection.

Of course, with the Democratic nomination going down to the wire, there's the additional danger of Hillary spreading misspeak in the guise of fashion. Better slap an injunction on this whole mess now before somebody gets out of hand.

Marc Jacobs Photo Shoot a Posh Mosh Collection

The truth is I'm pretty peeved at myself for spending so much time away. Trying to line up jobs, get exposure, run a household, and be a person... the juggling act is starting to take its toll. Oh, it'll all work out in the end, I'm sure. But in the meantime, The Spewker is definitely taking it on the chin.

To make it up to all our loyal fans -- all five of you -- I'm skewering Victoria Beckham a/k/a/ Posh Spice and her Marc Jacobs photo shoot. The photographs are such a riot, I can't help reprinting them here. But in case I get asked to take them down, you can still laugh at the originals here.


Sara McCorquodale, writing for DailyMail, hones in on this thumbsucker fetal position monstrosity, calling it a way for Posh to evade her status as a fashion icon.


If you ask me, Posh looks like a maid with rubber cleaning gloves who can't decide whether she's going to do a Maypole dance or go to town on her fingers. The streamers flowing from her backside make her look like she's sprouted a tail. You know, if someone would turn this photo to the left 90 degrees, she'd look like a thumbsucker on an invisible pogo stick. Ugh. Yuck. Make it go away.

This frog whisperer photo isn't much better...



Is she trying to seduce the frog, suck it like her thumb, or position her mouth just so hoping it will leap inside? The gloves look thick and oversized, like vintage clothing from the bottom of your mother's hope chest to wear on Halloween. And what's with the hair? Sweat much? It's positively slick, shiny and hanging in clumpy wisps. Couldn't they stop the shoot for a quick shampoo and a blowdry?

Finally, this last composite, I'm not quite sure what to make of it.



I've never seen Posh look quite so Oriental. Is it that black beanie-looking thing over her forehead or the way she's holding the tote like a ninja warrier weapon? Every tense muscle and bulging bicep says this is not a woman to tangle with in a dark alley. Those pink rings around her neck and sleeves -- are they part of some gauzey see-through shirt? Why even bother with a shirt like this? I can see everything nature gave the lady and stuff it didn't. Mashed up implants ready to snap a bra strap or two.

Don't these designers believe in leaving anything to the imagination?

Chinese Re-Education Camps. Plus, the Olympic Torch Relay Faced Protests in London.

The droplets of news that are coming out of Tibet suggest that protests continue in pockets as does violent repression. At least eight people were reportedly killed in a remote town in Sichuan province Thursday in a protest sparked by an attempt to force monks to participate in an education campaign.

James: Re-education camps are nothing new to dictatorships. Soviet Communist Russia and Nazi Germany were two classic examples of this kind of absurd propaganda. The other major example in history being, of course, Communist China.

One 27 year old monk in Tibet participated in his first party-led education session in 1993. He did not have to sign a denunciation that time but had to condemn the Dalai Lama in front of his fellow monks. "I had to be very active, had to prove I was really patriotic, so I can pass the exam," he said. "In order to stay in the monastery, I did this. I clearly know the other monks did not do this from their hearts, and not me, either."

James: And as hard as it must be verbally utter those words disavowing the Dalai Lama it was their only choice and correct one. It was Right Intention because to say otherwise would likely land this monk in prison were he would be beaten or perhaps killed and perhaps place his family in danger as well. I do not profess to be an expert on the Dalai Lama or speak for His Holiness but I have a feeling that he would rather people swallow their pride and say what the Chinese government officials want to hear than see them suffer for their loyalty to him.
LONDON — Protesters objecting to China’s human rights record clashed with the British police on Sunday as the Olympic torch was carried through London on its way to the summer Olympic Games in Beijing.

James: I am sure that the Chinese government is furious over these protests and demonstrations but they are reaping what they have sown for decades. It is karma catching up with them. I do realize however that most of these party officials don't believe in karma but they can not deny the suffering and problems that can result from the law of cause and effect which is a scientific principle.

And I know that science is something that Communism DOES believe in.

~Peace to all beings (yes, even the Chinese government even though I disagree firmly with many of their actions)~

Boss Tweed's Birthday.

By the way, in case you missed it, this past Wednesday (April 3) was the 185th birthday of my own favorite icon of American civic virtue, Wm. Magear Tweed, The Boss, who presided over New York's Tammany Hall as grafter in chief from the Civil War until late 1872. By then, Tweed and friends has stolen as estimated $45 to $200 million from the city and county treasuries -- a sum worth billions in modern money. Along the way, they also did more good, did more to build the City, help the poor and immigrants get a foothold in society, and give government a friendly human face than just about anyone else of their generation.

Here the link to an interview I did on the occasion for NPR's Bryant Street Project:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=89333730

In honor of the occasion, I give you my two favorite pictures of The Boss. First, here is Thomas Nast's classic "Twas Him," from the Harper's Weekly of August 19, 1871. The caption reads "Who stole the peoples' money?" Tweed is the chubby man holding his hat:

Then, there is this cover drawing from the January 6, 1871 Evening Telegram showing Tweed leading the dancers at Tammany's New Year's celebration at the NY Academy of Music:

So Happy Birthday, Boss. They don't make politians like you any more and, frankly, we are all poorer as a result. --KenA

Martin Luther King Jr. Killed 40 Years Ago but the Vision Lives On.

(The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. standing in an office with a picture of Gandhi, his hero on the wall).

Forty years ago today the great race and civil rights peace activist Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated. In that moment there were many in the civil rights movement who feared that Martin's vision of equality amongst all races, religions and ethnic groups would die with him. However, his wave of peaceful, loving energy had planted seeds of hope and change within the hearts of millions just as those same seeds had been planted in his heart from the example of Gandhi.

Just as those seeds grew within his mind, he knew that the fertile seeds of his vision would transfer from one person to the next via the winds of inevitable change to each new generation. He understood the peaceful power of oneness and inter-connection. He understood that with each new generation the seed would grow stronger, the roots would dig deeper and that that the tree would eventually ripen the fruit of his labors and bring about the change needed.

And that tree has indeed grown into a vibrant, strong one that has born much fruit to where today we are on the cusp of the possible election of America's first African-American president.

So while we still have work to do I think that Dr. King would be proud of what we have done with the vision that he left us to fulfill.

May we continue to pass those seeds of equality and tolerance to all those whom we meet along our path.

While we represent different cultural and ethnic branches of humanity may we always remember that we are all still apart of the same vibrant tree.

~Peace to all beings~

Merde: the politics of dog pooh

While reading the newspaper this morning, one particular quote from Alain Juppé, the recently re-elected Mayor of Bordeaux, made me chuckle and then made me wonder.

Quoted in an article about a new campaign group being set up in the city to fight against the littering of the cities' streets with dog's mess, Juppé said: "Slipping on a dog poop the day of an election could change a vote". ("Glisser sur une crotte de chien le jour d'une election peut changer un vote")

But could it? Everyone's suffered it at one stage; perhaps no more so than the French.

Having pavements coated in dog pooh is often a common perception of France, and in certain parts of Bordeaux this is almost certainly the case. In the Saint-Jean area of the city, where visitors arrive in the city from the train station or are dropped off by the bus from the airport, the problem is especially bad.

It is almost impossible to drag your suitcase along the pavement without encountering the stuff or having to cause mass discontent by shaloming around it all. Not the best thing to welcome visitors to the city...

It is because of this that a group of local residents have set up a campaign group that campaigns for less dog pooh on the pavements. One member of the Comité "Anti-caca", Eric Lepage, is quoted in today's Metro as saying: "All we ask is that the city's streets are as clean as they are beautiful, so you can admire the building facades instead of having to watch where you walk!" ("Nous demandons que les rues soient aussi propres que belles, qu'on puisse admirer les façades au lieu de regarder où on marche!")

According to the group, more than 30 tonnes of dog pooh are removed from the streets of Bordeaux by the council every year. In a bid to reduce this staggering quantity, the council have this year provided 150 special bins and have introduced a maximum penalty of 450Euros (approx £300) for repeat offenders. They are clearly treating this as a serious issue.

And so they should, tourists don't want to arrive in a beautiful city only to find themselves constantly looking at the pavements. Tourism is such an important industry for the city, but it remains to be seen whether stepping in dog's mess could change a persons vote. And while it would probably be quite unusual for a candidate to speak of these such issues while campaigning, maybe they should so to avoid being defeated and then finding themselves, as they say, in the merde.

NB: Note the date of this article...